The other night I could not sleep because of worries. Once
I started to inspect these worries I had to admit that they had little grounds
to stand on, and that my phantasy had taken off with me...
There I was: In the middle of a wonderful vacation in Europe, having time to hike in the Austrian Alps, adoring the golden glory of the fall foliage and being able to spend time with family and friends. Also, my husband and I were in the process of moving our furniture and belongings from our former Vienna apartment to our San Diego house. We were very much looking forward to having the European Chic in our house. The international moving company was hired, the boxes already picked up. How much better could it get? I was grateful, very grateful. Things were in flow. Fortunate us.
Then, one day before the sea freight container was to be loaded, I realized that I still had not received the promised insurance paper from our Austrian moving company. All day I had tried to reach her - without success. All 3 telephone numbers I had stayed unanswered. No e-mails from them in my inbox. So, in that night it occured to me that the big chunk of money had changed hands already (that´s how they do it in that line of work) and they had driven off with all of our belongings. Could it be a scam? Could they be that good? I started to doubt the good feeling I had had with them. My phantasy was taking off and was getting as dark as the night was.
It is very unusual for me not to be able to sleep. I felt highjacked by my own imagination. After a while of rolling around in bed I got my composure back. I asked myself what was really wrong in reality? I had all kinds of worst case possibilities, but had not looked at the likelyhood of them being the case. I had also not looked at all the reasons why that was not likely to be the case. I went through all off that and came to the conclusion that there must be something going on that I did not know and that was not anything out of my "worries box".
I also remembered that it is not always personal, not always about me. True, it is unusual not to reach anyone from a company anymore after handing over the money, when the availability had been perfect before. But does it have to be my worst idea?
During those dark hours I learned a lot. I was very happy that I made that reality check and that I found my faith again. I even got to the point where I realized that my peace of mind was worth more than any belongings and money. A day lost and not lived can never be replaced. Money and things always can be.
The next day I learned that the family business was in uproar for a day, because the father of one of the partners had had a bad car accident. I understood. I also learned my lesson. It felt good to be able to calm myself down in difficult times. True, we don´t always know the people we are dealing with, but I prefer and choose to have a trusting, while alert, way of approaching others. If I see thieves everywhere, I might find them everywhere. And if I see helpful and reliable people everywhere, I just might as well find them everywhere as well.
I think that it is deeply ingrained in us to protect ourselves. But if that tendencie becomes too tight and almost paranoid, it reaches the point where it harms us and keeps us from oportunities rather than protect us. It is wise to know the difference and keep checking, where the border lies again and again.