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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

"Never Waste a Good Crisis" (Hillary Clinton)

On how a crisis is truly an intro to finally getting towards your dreams, towards your true YOU. It is a possibility to investigate what to let go of (the fake things) and what the next step towards more self realization is. Are you up for it? It is so rewarding to summon the courage to take a crisis on as GOOD. The rewards are beyond your imagination.
The quote came to me in the right moment in an unlikely way: Sitting in my office in San Diego California, I was editing articles for the Journal of Psychology in Austria. One of the authors used this quote as an opening. It came to me in the right time: It was summer and I had just returned from a wonderful stay with my family in Austria. I felt so close to them and thought that things went well - even with my Mum. My Mum and I have an ambivalent relationship. She had a pretty bad childhood and does her best. I love her - and do my best. Nevertheless, she is the ONE person who can send my day down a deep slope in a 5 minute phone call all the way from rural Austria to urban California: 10 000 kilometers! So it had happened that morning, before I got to editing those articles. I had cooled off enough already in order to notice: That quote was there for me! What a great way to look at it! Especially with family you know that breaking ties is not an option. So there has to be another way than no contact or constant emotional roller coaster rides (very exhausting and depleting). I accepted the challenge and truly listened to my heart for the next step, what would help us both the most in this situation. The question was always only "What is the next step?" Miraculously, the next step always showed up, while I could not see the outcome, the goal yet. Now, many "NEXT STEPS" beyond, my husband and I are about to purchase our dream vacation home in the beautiful basin in Austria, where I grew up. We are thrilled at the prospect of being able to build a relationship with the people there, with the individual family members. We will no longer try to please our hosts (my parents) and fit our whole schedule around them just to find out in retrospect that that still was not the right approach (my mother would NEVER express any desire of her own, leaving her environment to failure-doomed guessing). I am so excited! It feels like I found the right setup so we all have enough distance in order to be pleasant and be able to show our love. I am excited about honoring my roots in that way. It was still somewhat of a roller coaster ride getting there, but I remember the conscious decision to make use of the crisis and do something new, find that jewel in the whole mess, taking advantage of the already shook up situation. In retrospect, times of crisis were always a great opportunity for me to break free from what did not work (anymore) and to find the new something that I could only dream of before a crisis opened up the possibility to actually go there. You may say about Hillary Clinton what you want, but that quote is a treasure to be taken to heart!

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